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Submitted on
August 27, 2011
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We are all intertwined.
Blood and flesh,
United in existence.

We with our gaping mouths spilling countless words.
We with our open eyes endlessly searching.
We hear, we touch, we cry.
Whether that be for fear or melancholy.

Together we strive,
Together we fall,
Together we crush each other and raise each other up.

We are humanity,
Incredibly diverse,
Complicated beyond necessity.

No one will ever understand us.
Sometimes,
Not even ourselves.
Brain barf lol. I was just sitting here and thinking and this came up. Not sure why since originally I going to start with: "If you can't speak it, I'll speak it for you."
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:iconimaginative-lioness:
imaginative-lioness Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
'We with our gaping mouths spilling countless words.
We with our open eyes endlessly searching.
We hear, we touch, we cry.
Whether that be for fear or melancholy.'


This is my favourite part of this piece, I really like the repetition, it gives a lot of impact. You have done a wonderful job with this piece also, I really like this. :heart:
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:iconwhatonearth:
whatonearth Featured By Owner Jun 23, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you. :D
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:icon3wyl:
3wyl Featured By Owner Sep 14, 2011  Hobbyist Photographer
I like the way you've started and how you've gone straight to the point there to make as great an impact as possible.

The repetition in the second stanza is particularly effective in comparison to the first, and I like the rule of three you've used too, as that increases the impact further.

It's quite interesting how you've sort of rhymed... or maybe it's just the general rhythm and flow of things.

The ending is quite abrupt, but fitting, I think... and perhaps it describes and reflects on humanity well.

Quite cool, anyway. :D
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:iconwhatonearth:
whatonearth Featured By Owner Sep 14, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks so much. :la:
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:iconmerrak:
merrak Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2011  Hobbyist
Neat poem. I feel, for the most part, it rings true. But I'm not sure what you're trying to get across in line 4. Are you saying mankind speaks too much? Doesn't listen enough? I can't quite put my finger on why that line jumps out at me.
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:iconwhatonearth:
whatonearth Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I was trying to say that we are a busy race, always pushing forward. That we do so much. That was an example.
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:iconmerrak:
merrak Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2011  Hobbyist
I see, now. For the record, I disagree with ~Kalypher's interpretation. I simply just got lost.

What stands out to me the most, though, is lines 14-16. It's the best ten-word summary of all of Human history and its motivations I've read to date.

I forgot to mention #Intermediate-Artists ... although I don't have a deviation to submit to the feedback folder. Just thought it'd be useful to know the feedback folder generated a response :)
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:iconwhatonearth:
whatonearth Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Ah ok.

Thank you!

Well if you have something to submit later this week you can still use this comment. Also, I appreciate it! Good to know this group is doing some good. Ever since I created this group I've been striving to make it useful to the community. :)
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:iconmerrak:
merrak Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2011  Hobbyist
I think it is useful :) There aren't many groups between ``beginner'' and ``elite.'' I thought rule 8 was a neat idea, but I don't think it would've addressed the # watchers < # members issue. That might have more to do with either too many deviations per day allowed, or too many flavors of art going through. I know some people un-watch a group, but go into the gallery folders just to look at whatever type of art they like. I don't do that for small groups (I like to broaden my horizons) - but for the 10,000+ member groups, it's just too overwhelming to come home and find 1,000 to 2,000 deviations from one group alone.
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:iconwhatonearth:
whatonearth Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
This group never had that many going through. :P Like sixty a week until the eighth rule dropped the submission rate to like ten a week. Also, I wasn't trying to make the watcher to member ratio match more, I was trying to get people in the group to participate.

Glad you like this group!
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